69/222 pages revised. Killing it. Loving it. So proud of it. Can't wait for Monday to dive back in.
I put this up today on FB:
It is an unavoidable, soul-crushing, core-shifting moment when you discover you are surrounded by people you love in your day-to-day world, who love you, but have absolutely no interest in the things that interest you, or what you think about them.
This was the result of trying to have a conversation with my daughter, and realizing she was absolutely not interested in anything I was saying. It all just hit me--just about everyone in my day-to-day life, friends, family both immediate and extended, are completely uninterested in what I do. They love me! They are proud of me! They are excited for me! But they have no real interest after that.
I'm not angry, or even upset--it's just one of those epiphanies that takes you by surprise and leaves you gasping just a little. I was quickly assuaged by the fact that though my family and hometown friends really aren't interested in writing or fantasy or even reading, I do have a community that fills that space. Several, in fact. I have my Viable Paradise friends, my Virginia Beach Dollbabies, my Hadley Rille Book family, my writing group, and I have my LJ community. I have people to talk about such things with who not only share my interests, but are enthusiastic about sharing thoughts on them. And they are interested in what I do and what I think. I am blessed.
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bogwitch64- Terri-Lynne DeFino
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You are very lucky to have folks to talk writing with.
My husband is supportive and reads the non-fiction I write, but will not read fiction. Just not his thing.
And because he's not big on grammar, he didn't quite grasp the difference between talking TO and talking WITH--and thus my point is proven!
The point is - it isn't the friends & families job to understand the process. Their job is to be proud of the outcome. It's like being an accountant & expecting your wife to get overexcited about the intricacies of auditing. It's never going to happen.
Compartmentalise my dear! Bask in the glory of the, 'Wow! Mom wrote another book!' moments. The rest of us will get you when you're wrestling with your plot lines & edits. ;)
I do understand - it's the same for me. The blank look & the 'That's nice' smile which is a euphemism for, 'I have no idea why you are getting so excited about this.'
Essentially, writers (painters et al) are weird - to the rest of the non-creative world, we are odd. The outside world, while benignly impressed & even secretly envious, simply doesn't get it. I have rarely had an 'in depth' conversation with any of my non-writing nearest & dearest about 'what I do' - the process or the passion I often feel about it.
The exceptions would be my youngest son - he is a craftsman & 'gets' that when I write I feel real. But it's still generalised. And my best friend will always listen if I feel the need to explode with excitement about something. For the rest, it's polite nodding & relief when the phone rings or the doorbell goes.
"The outside world, while benignly impressed & even secretly envious, simply doesn't get it. "
Go here --> http://bogwitch64.livejournal.com/31274
I once opened my Christmas present from my son & discovered he had chosen the exact same book I'd sent him.
it's much worse when the people surrounding you
not only don't care, but don't love you, either.
Sorry to sound like such a whiner.
Have a great weekend, too!
I have one friend who is fond of telling me he'd rather stick needles in his eyes than read. He can't fathom spending time reading, let alone writing.
I have the same problem with my hubby and my entire family when it comes to my writing. They are supportive of me though, so that's what counts. :)
Yup, an accountant. He's actually CFO for a group of health clubs in the NY/CT area, so--superaccountant!
Happy Weekend :)
I wouldn't say my IRL friends and family have "no interest." We share other interests--my husband and I love to hike together, watch certain movies. We have the same sense of humor, the same politics, overlapping though not identical tastes in music, similar views on many things.
But he doesn't read YA lit (or essays, memoirs, contemp adult novels, or general nonfiction, all of which I also read). And I read almost no science fiction. So, book-wise, we don't have a common interest.
I have shared interests with many IRL friends (science, politics, nature, etc.), but even my IRL writer friends mostly don't write YA, and so social media fill a certain need in that department.
As far as people being supportive, but not "getting it", I think it might be the difference between people who create things, and people who don't. People who don't make things themselves, may certainly love you & support you & want you to succeed, but what they perceive & understand is mostly the end result, the fact that the book, or whatever the work is, now exists--not the process that goes into creating it.
Luckily I married a woman who shares many nerd-lusts and, even when she doesn't, is polite enough to listen with only slightly feigned interest.
...and I hope you noticed above (and on FB,) how many times I cited YOU as the only one who gets me.
Still, to have a family and friends who love you and support you is a gift too ...